Josh’s perspective

I asked Josh if there was anything he wanted to add to the blog and he wrote this.  Thank you for contributing my love.

It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon at PNC Park.  I was spending the day at the Pirate game with my wife, Summer, and my in-laws.  We were sitting in the second row on the first base side in right field. Fantastic seats.  The day was perfect.  So perfect in fact, that I almost started to forget the situation that Summer and myself were in until I read his shirt.   The row in front of us is reserved for the fans that are confined to wheelchairs.  At the start of the second inning, I was scanning the ballpark, taking in all the sights.  I glanced down to the first row, and a man was wearing a shirt that had two visible sentences on it.  It was all I needed to see.   “I always thought I would tell my daughter about the world, but I have to tell the world about my daughter.”  That’s what I plan to do now.  Her name is Linden Lilac Voelker.  She has not yet seen this Earth, and as the days grow longer, it seems that she will.  I don’t even remember the date we heard the news; the past 4 months have been an absolute blur.   She has been diagnosed with Trisomy 13, a triplication of the 13th chromosome.  Babies that are diagnosed with this condition are usually stillborn.  If they make it to full term, our doctor told us the best case scenario is 2 years of life.  We have already made it 4 weeks further than our doctor’s last Trisomy patient made it, so I take that as a good sign.  I am so nervous, scared, frustrated, devastated, confused and angry.   That being said, I cannot wait to look into her eyes for the first time.  I can almost picture it in my head.  I know it will be love at first sight.  She is the strongest little girl.  I know this because she has been holding on and fighting to meet Summer and I.  Our time together is definitely going to be different that what I had planned, but every moment spent with Linden will be a gift that I will cherish for the rest of my life.  She has not even been born yet, and I know that she is already the most loved baby girl on the planet.  This is what keeps me going on a day to day basis..  I know that no time will be wasted.   I know that whatever happens in the upcoming months will change me forever.  I will be a better person for having Linden in my life, no matter how long that may be.


2 thoughts on “Josh’s perspective

  1. Mary Hixon says:

    Josh, your words and actions are as powerful as Summer’s. I could not ask for a more perfect son in law for my darling Daughter. As i try to write this through a flood of tears, the love, respect and awe I have for you are overwhelming.

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